The Closed Door
For my thoughts are not your thoughts, neither are your ways my ways, declares the Lord. Isaiah 55:8
God has closed a door. For months I have been eagerly anticipating an opportunity to which I felt truly led. Now that opportunity has evaporated. It is gone, due to human error, although not my error. I had to rely on other people doing their jobs and someone didn’t. For a moment I felt sick. I felt the bile of disappointment rise in my throat. Then I remembered a teaching I heard just yesterday.
Yesterday morning I was not feeling well and stayed home from church. While resting I tuned into a program that features an evangelist I used to listen to quite often. I haven’t heard him or read anything by him in the last year or so. Yesterday his message was for me. I just didn’t know it until today.
I listened as he spoke about his own disappointments and a very serious situation that had troubled his father. He spoke about how in such situations each of us has a choice. We can choose defeat or see it as a redirection. In the case of his father, what might have been a nice little ministry was instead a huge ministry, all because of adversity.
As he spoke I realized that what he was saying had a familiar ring. Not like, oh, yeah, I know this. More like, wait, didn’t I just read this somewhere? That is because I did just read basically the same message from Beth Moore. She was writing about how sometimes God says no to rescue us or to save us for something better. When what we are asking isn’t good enough for us, God says no. Hm….
So here I am this evening, disappointed still but also a bit excited. As the one pastor said, not getting what I think I wanted will leave room for something better. This no, this slammed door, this obvious invitation to ranting and raving and pure frustration, may be an enormous blessing in disguise. I certainly hope and pray that it is.
God’s ways are not my ways, thankfully. God is perfect. I am a mess. I do not pretend to understand why this happened or how. All I know is that I need to trust that God will swing wide a much better door. I can choose door number one, anger, frustration and disappointment. I can choose door number two, sulking, giving up, deciding I misunderstood God in the first place. Or I can choose door number three, the door behind which stands my Father. That door takes trust and patience, two things that are hard for me, but I will choose that door. I have to, He’s been prepping me for it for the last week.
God has closed a door. For months I have been eagerly anticipating an opportunity to which I felt truly led. Now that opportunity has evaporated. It is gone, due to human error, although not my error. I had to rely on other people doing their jobs and someone didn’t. For a moment I felt sick. I felt the bile of disappointment rise in my throat. Then I remembered a teaching I heard just yesterday.
Yesterday morning I was not feeling well and stayed home from church. While resting I tuned into a program that features an evangelist I used to listen to quite often. I haven’t heard him or read anything by him in the last year or so. Yesterday his message was for me. I just didn’t know it until today.
I listened as he spoke about his own disappointments and a very serious situation that had troubled his father. He spoke about how in such situations each of us has a choice. We can choose defeat or see it as a redirection. In the case of his father, what might have been a nice little ministry was instead a huge ministry, all because of adversity.
As he spoke I realized that what he was saying had a familiar ring. Not like, oh, yeah, I know this. More like, wait, didn’t I just read this somewhere? That is because I did just read basically the same message from Beth Moore. She was writing about how sometimes God says no to rescue us or to save us for something better. When what we are asking isn’t good enough for us, God says no. Hm….
So here I am this evening, disappointed still but also a bit excited. As the one pastor said, not getting what I think I wanted will leave room for something better. This no, this slammed door, this obvious invitation to ranting and raving and pure frustration, may be an enormous blessing in disguise. I certainly hope and pray that it is.
God’s ways are not my ways, thankfully. God is perfect. I am a mess. I do not pretend to understand why this happened or how. All I know is that I need to trust that God will swing wide a much better door. I can choose door number one, anger, frustration and disappointment. I can choose door number two, sulking, giving up, deciding I misunderstood God in the first place. Or I can choose door number three, the door behind which stands my Father. That door takes trust and patience, two things that are hard for me, but I will choose that door. I have to, He’s been prepping me for it for the last week.
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