Conversation

 

Be joyful always, pray continually; give thanks in all circumstances

1 Thessalonians 5:16-18a

Yesterday on my way to church I was thinking about prayer, about the way that people pray, when we pray and why. Oddly enough, that was the message of our pastor's sermon, prayer, the when, why and how of it. He took a wider view than what I'd been thinking but still affirmed some of my thoughts.

Driving along I thought of my children. I raised the four of them together, same expectations, same boundaries, differing approaches, based on their personalities but with the same standards. Each one of them addresses me differently, approaches me differently and each relationship is unique.

Sadly at this point in time I don't hear from all of them but when I did the greetings were all so different. The phone rings and I see the name. “Hello” will be spoken in a semi-formal way and not followed up by any remark until I respond and initiate a conversation. Next ring, we'll call this one, enter talking, “Hi, so I was thinking......” or “guess what?” The third call, “Hi Mama!” And the fourth, “I need a favor.”

Simply from seeing the name I could guess the tone of the call. My formal caller calls only to make plans, or check in. While we have a great relationship and can chat comfortably in person, this one is not good on the phone. It's the device not the relationship that is the problem. Enter talking, is great on the phone, a text, email and in person. There are no hidden agendas here. “Mama” calls to chat. This one is open and easy going, not hindered by the phone. This one just wants the connection, to talk and to listen. “Favor” calls only when absolutely necessary and the calls are decidedly one sided. If I have something to say, well, there's really no time to say it.

Thinking of them I realized that I pray in all of those ways. Sometimes I feel so formal. “Dear Lord.....” Other times I feel just like spilling everything, with no regard to how it sounds, not even pausing for a greeting sometimes. Then there are the days when I just want to chat with my Abba, my Daddy. “Hi Abba!” It's the simple delight of being connected. And the other times, the ones I like least and often feel badly about later. “Help!” A request made with no room for an answer to be given and some resentment if it doesn't immediately go my way.

What I saw in all of that and what my pastor confirmed, is that prayer is a conversation. It's about relationship and love. While God does provide and absolutely hears my cries, mostly it's about connection.

It breaks my heart to say that the “Hi Mama” calls no longer come. That relationship is broken. The joy of seeing that name on the phone is gone. The call that came simply because there was love and care between us doesn't happen anymore. For me, seeing that just makes me want to spend way more time simply saying, “Hi Abba!” To never lose that connection and to honor the love given to me by returning it as best I can.

I know my Father has plans for me, cares about everything I think and do, and will answer my prayer request in the way He knows is best for me. What I need most is to keep talking and keep listening.