High/Low



As I was with Moses, so I will be with you; I will never leave you nor forsake you. Be strong and courageous.  Joshua 1:5-6a

 
Does your family do the high/low game?  It’s the game where at dinner or bedtime, each person in the family tells their high and low point of the day.  The idea is to make us more aware of our blessings and show us that in light of those blessings the lows maybe aren’t so low or are at least bearable.

Yesterday, in an effort to distract myself from some things that had occurred during my day,  I played the game with three of my grandchildren.  They are all under the age of nine so their answers were quite precious.  Two art projects and a “cool way to play football with a soccer ball” made the high list. The lows were benign in the extreme. It warmed my heart as my high and low were the exact same thing and I was still in the throes of trying to process it. To be perfectly frank, I’m still trying to process it.

God is incredibly good.  In his goodness he has answered one of the most earnest prayers of my heart.  Yesterday I found out that someone who used to be very near and dear to me received a miraculous answer to prayer. It was absolutely a PRAISE GOD moment. Upon hearing the news that is exactly what I did. Due to God’s mercy I was able to stay completely in that praise mindset for several hours. That was an enormous high.

The low? Note the words, “used to be very near and dear.”  There is an estrangement now that takes me a bit away from the miracle.  While I should be knee deep in celebration I am barely able to dip my toe in the oceans of joy that are a part of this news.  In recent months I’ve gone from near and dear to persona non grata. It’s quite a conundrum. So when the reality set in and the realization came that I am an outsider in this miracle, an observer with no invitation to come closer I felt my heart break.

Wait a minute! While my feelings are absolutely valid there is no room for heartbreak here. This is cause for celebration. This is  praise God moment after praise God moment. What was said to be impossible is not. It’s happened! This is certainly a thing that only God can do.

Does my heart still bleed? Oh yes, all over the floor! And yet, I know that my redeemer lives. I know that he will carry me through my personal pain. This is a bit of a storm for me and in this moment I can pretty much hear Jesus snoring in the back of the boat, my boat. In the other boat he’s dancing an Irish jig and for that I am extremely grateful.

For my part, I know he never lets go of me. Calm, storm, joyous, heartbroken or as in this case some odd mixture of all of the above, my Abba holds me in his hand and he won’t let me go. So to the enemy who is attempting to minimize this miracle and cause me sadness because of it I say, “get behind me!” My God reigns and this is a huge high, a huge victory. Praise God.

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