Bullying

The day of the Lord is near for all nations.

As you have done, it will be done to you: your deeds will return upon your own head.  Obadiah 1:15

 My day job is in a public elementary school. One of my duties occurs at the end of the day when I stand outside with a few other people as we attempt to get all the students home safely.  Today a co-worker of mine followed after a boy accused of bullying.  This is not some power hunger teacher who was out to prove her authority.  Her name is Beth and she is an extremely lovely and kind person who claims Jesus Christ among her friends. Her purpose today was to stop trouble before it got started. As she walked away I was thinking how glad I was that it was her and not me. I can’t stand bullies in general and this boy in particular, has rubbed me the wrong way since he was a first grade student.

Beth followed him and I got busy with some other children and didn’t see if she had to intervene or even speak to Peck’s Bad Boy.  I saw her walk behind him and I saw her when she came back. I wondered when I saw her returning what she could have said to him if in fact she had caught him in the act of harassing another child. We are not allowed to mention the name of Jesus anywhere near our school. How then do you convince a kid with a chip on his shoulder to be kind and respectful?

Everything I know about kindness and respect comes from Scripture.  In the Word we are taught to love one another (John 13:34), to be kind to each other (1 Thessalonians 5:15, Ephesians 4:32) and to treat each other as we want to be treated. (Matthew 7:12) That last one is referred to as the Golden Rule. I suppose Beth could have used that if she didn’t tell the child that it originates in Scripture. Unfortunately without noting its origins a lot of what we say ends up sounding clichéd and the children in question stop listening. For the most part all that we know about love, respect and compassion is off limits for conversation in public schools.

So we raise children in a society that says second place is the first loser. We teach them to assert themselves without explaining the boundaries between assertive and aggressive because, again, to do so might mean using some of those Bible words. We imply at the very least, that each individual is the master of his or her own destiny and then we say, “No bullying.”

To which the more naturally aggressive or mean children respond, “I’m not bullying. I’m just telling him the truth. I wasn’t being mean. I’m just trying to get ahead.” The list of excuses goes on and on but nowhere does it reference the idea of being our brothers’ keeper.

How much easier it would have been for Beth, would it be for all of us if we could say, “Be kind.” And when asked why, respond with, “Because Jesus said so.”  That would not end bullying. Bullying has always existed and sadly always will. I don’t know how to end it or even lessen it. I do know this, it won’t happen without God and as long as we are not allowed to mention his name it will most likely get worse.